Monday, April 30, 2012

For heaven's sake, don't read about these scary gay parents

I have a relative named Vaune, and Vaune has a blog. I stumbled upon it last night and love it so much I have to, in turn, blog about the blog.

I'm not blogging about it because Vaune is using it to make sweeping proclamations or inviting brave political discourse. I'm blogging about it because it's wonderful in its simplicity, focusing on Vaune's life with her spouse and two sons. They camp. They fish. They have coffee on their deck.

The reason that the blog's simplicity is relevant is that Vaune and Lisa happen to be a gay couple. And in this age of Tea Party politics and a northwest-Iowa teen taking his life because he had been bullied for coming out, it's relevant to note that Vaune and Lisa, and thousands of couples just like them, are simply living their lives.

They're not hosting orgies or burning crosses or even stumping for President Obama. They're working and grocery-shopping and buying a new house because they want their boys to attend school in a district with smaller class sizes. They're wondering how to explain Santa to their kids, and they're eating birthday cake.

Former University of Iowa student Zach Wahls recently wrote a book about his similarly normal life with two moms; he was urged to do so after his most excellent address to the Iowa House of Representatives on the topic went viral. Zach and individuals like him are a testament to the fact that families such as Vaune and Lisa's work. They work because the parents are ethical, principled, upstanding citizens who work hard to raise their children with unconditional love and a strong sense of what's right and what's wrong.

Teenage boys who kill themselves because they're tormented for being honest about who they are: That's wrong. Families like Vaune's who are brave enough to simply live their lives: How can that be anything but right?


  1. I'm glad you found my blog and enjoyed reading it. Our lives are simple and happy with our children. It is sad about bullying, for any reason, and the trauma it can cause an individual trying to live their life the best they can. FYI, before we moved last year, Zach was our neighbor. He has always been a go-getter with a great head on his shoulders!

  2. Love this! The Wahls family is often on my mind as one of his moms, Terry, is a researcher here at the U and spoke to our med school class about multiple sclerosis, etc. Amazing family full of smarty pants! I am hoping to read his book once class finishes.

    Our hope for society ought to be that children are loved unconditionally. Why are we wasting so much time, energy, and resources trying to narrow down the definition of "family"? Why don't people applaud ALL loving families? Gay, straight, divorced, remarried, interracial, interfaith, families with one child, families with lots of children, etc. Gay couples are just the latest casualty in some people hating anything that is "different" from who they are and what they know. Can't wait to be 50 years from now and see my gay friends have families that are accepted by EVERYONE....and see who the new scapegoat for societal problems is! Probably my amazing family with five kids being a "drain" on Mother Earth :-P

  3. Amen, Tana! And Vaune, please keep writing about your wonderful family. I am proud to know you both!